Here’s the thing… October 27, 2007

Although I’m a rational person (right?…) and I try to make choices based on what seems most rational or, in a way, safe, I do day-dream of irrational things at times. Although I love what I’m doing and I know I’m in the right field, I don’t want to spend the rest of my life living safely and wisely and making choices rationally.

When I listened to Rajaton at their concert the other day, I realized that in order for me to fully enjoy my life and get the most out of it, I need to start bringing out the more artistic side of me, too. I just can’t get over the amazingness of their gig and I know that I will do whatever it takes to be able to follow my dream. They have worked hard to make their dreams come true and their performance convinced me that there’s always hope and that it’s possible to make it if you really want something hard enough. I know I will be able to keep pursuing my academic degree and career plans whilst making my musical day-dreams come true.

My friend and I shook hands about something a while ago. If you read this, I still hold true to my promise -one day (maybe sooner than we think), it will all come true. I know it. Just keep believing.

Everything is changing October 16, 2007

As I flip through the pages of my calendar, I realize Toronto is closer than it seems. Life in Toronto is constantly on my mind as I buy new things and think what I might need once in Canada. But on the other hand, I feel like it won’t really dawn on me before I’m actually on the plane. In a way, I don’t want to leave. I would have no trouble living my life as it is, keeping up with the normal day-routine of going to work, wandering in the familiar campus area, and hanging out with friends that know me inside-out. But I also know that were I to stay, I would miss out on so much.

As my friend, who recently relocated to Paris put it, although life in Finland is great and wonderful, once abroad, you’re actually LIVING your life. And I must agree. There are so many things that I know I couldn’t do while in Finland, but will most definitely end up doing once in Toronto.

I’m honestly looking forward to leaving, and I feel excited about everything. But at the same time, I feel incredibly scared. I know it’ll pass and that living in Toronto will be a dream come true, but it is intimidating leaving everything familiar and important behind. After all, it will be my first time really being on my own, in a place I don’t know.

Thank goodness I still have time to go before I’ll board the plane. Because as of today, I’m not ready to go.

You must be kidding me! October 12, 2007

It’s not even mid-October. And it’s SNOWING. This is NOT funny. I wanna leave the country and go someplace warm.

Gosh Finland is one messed up place -weather-wise, that is…